NOW THAT'S FUNNY
While the nation gradually adjusts to changes in the healthcare laws, “Papa” John Schnatter, owner of Papa Johns, says one thing is for sure—he is going to need to raise the price of his pizzas.
When the new healthcare laws take full effect in 2014, the pizza chain will be forced to provide healthcare coverage to all of its full time employees. Papa John warns that adding coverage for workers will be expensive for his company, and that they will simply pass that cost onto consumers, at the rate of about 14 cents a pie.
Yet, as reported by ABC News, most of the pizza parlors are independent franchises, and franchises need only provide insurance for their workers when they employ more than 50 people. I doubt any of the franchises have that many employees.
According to CBSDC, Schnatter went so far as to tell as his shareholders: “If Obamacare is in fact not repealed, we will find tactics to shallow out any Obamacare costs and core strategies to pass that cost onto consumers in order to protect our shareholders best interests.”
After Schnatter made these statements, the company’s Facebook page was inundated with emotional reactions. Many customers have pledged that they would be happy to pay extra to give the pizza workers the health coverage they need. Fourteen cents is actually less than the cost of getting an extra topping, like, say, peppers. People wrote things like “no more Papa Johns’ for us. Healthcare is more important than 14 cents for a topping.”
Hm. I think I have a solution to this thorny issue. If people are willing to have their healthcare, and eat their pizza, too, why not sell the medical coverage a la carte?
Customers could order a large pie with routine vaccinations and an upper GI endoscopy. They could choose an Extra Cheese/Pepperoni/PreNatal Care Pie.
Papa John already has quite a few “specialty” pizzas on its menu, and could customize these even further:
Chicken Parmesan Hip Replacement, Spinach Alfredo Blood Pressure Screening, or a side of Chipotle Chicken Strips with a Skin Tag Removal Dipping Sauce.
This is so easy … I don’t know why people can’t reach a compromise on this health care thing.
John Schnatter is a Romney supporter, and recently held a fundraiser for Mitt as his home in Kentucky. I would bet he served pizza … but no word on what toppings were added.
Pam Lobley writes the “Now That’s Funny” column. Her book, “You Definitely Know You’re a Mom When …” is now available on Kindle. Follow her on Twitter @plobley.