Eli Manning earns MVP for helping fans forget Madonna's halftime show

BY JOEY NOVICK

WHAT EXIT?

SATIRE

At halftime, the New York Giants were down 10 to 9, trailing the New England Patriots Super Bowl XLVI — after showing domination early.

And then came an even bigger disaster for Giants fans: Madonna’s singing during the halftime show.

“I knew that the Giants needed a Knute-Rockne type speech in the locker room,” shared Coach Tom Coughlin.

So, Coughlin entered the locker room and told the team the words he heard from Madonna earlier that afternoon:

“I’ve got to go and sing, Tom. Yeah it’s all right. I’m not afraid. Some time, Tom, when the team is up against it, when things are going wrong and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to go in there with all they’ve got and ‘win just one for the Madonna’. I don’t know where I’ll be then, Tom. But I’ll know about it, and I’ll be happy.”

This inspired the Giants, who then beat the Patriots by 21-17.

“I knew in my heart that we need to give the crowd watching at home in New Jersey something that would make the world forget the Madonna performance,” added Giants quarterback Eli Manning.

Because of his performance, Manning was named the game’s MVP, receiving a brand-new car–––in large part, an anonymous sports writer shared––“for having to overcome Madonna’s performance.”

‎NJTV reporter asked of Manning, “Hey, Eli Manning, you just won the Super Bowl! Where are you going?”

Eli Manning’s response: “I’m going to Six Flags Great Adventure!”

Joey Novick is the Editor in Chief at www.whatexitnj.com.