newjerseynewsroom.com

BY PAM LOBLEY

NEWJERSEYNEWSROOM.COM

COMMENTARY

In case you haven't heard, Governor Christie has cut funding to the schools. In many districts, 100 percent of state aid has been cut. To matters worse, he's made some pretty harsh comments about the teachers. As I listened to these remarks, I couldn't help but remember that he has four children in school. What might his parent-teacher conference be like?

Governor Christie approaches the classroom door.

Teacher: Come in, Governor.

GC: Hi, Ms. Smith. Where should I sit?

Teacher: Well, we only have one chair left. We had to sell the furniture to make ends meet.

GC: I guess we can just sit on the floor.

Teacher: I'll sit over here so we're not too close. I wouldn't want you to think I have my hand in your pocket.

GC: Oh ... I get it. Good one.

Teacher: Well, here's your son's report. He's doing very well. He really enjoys music and art.

GC: Wait — you can still afford those programs?

Teacher: So far, yes. I am worried about his math scores, though. He's not great at adding — just subtracting. All he wants to do is subtract.

GC: That's my boy.

Teacher: We read ‘Johnny Tremain". He had some very interesting comments in his book report.

GC: Really?

Teacher: Yes. He felt that if there had been a decent worker's comp program in place Johnny wouldn't have suffered so much following his silversmith injury. He suggested the silversmiths form a union.

GC: What? I need to have a talk with the boy.

Teacher: Look Governor, I'm going to speak my mind. I took a lesser health plan last year, and this year I'll start paying into my benefits. I'm trying. You need to stop making teachers the enemy.

GC: I'm not the enemy either! We had $1 billion in federal stimulus money cut and no one's mad at Obama. That guy gets a pass on everything!

Teacher: I love Obama! His kids are adorable!

GC: I know.

Teacher: Can't you afford to give SOME aid to the schools?

GC: The state is out of money. We couldn't afford school aid last year, either, or the year before that, but we kept spending it anyway. Spending money that we don't have has got to stop, no matter how hard that is. I think giving our children a financially solvent state is just as important as giving them a good education.

Teacher: You're fat.

GC: That's been pointed out. I like a burger. Get over it.

Teacher: Well, I guess we'll see you at the Science Fair. Your son is doing an experiment on plants - he is going to see how little water he can give them and still have them survive.

GC: What a great idea! I can't wait to see that!

Of course, I made this whole encounter up: it could never have taken place. Governor Christie's children all attend parochial schools, and so were not affected by the budget cuts.

Pam Lobley is a columnist and co-author of the book "You Definitely Know You're a Mom When ..."