Just when you thought New Jersey couldn't be any more of a chagrined laughingstock with the orange kids from MTV’s "Jersey Shore" running amok, the mayor of Medford came along.
Chris Myers, the Republican mayor of Medford and former Congressional candidate, allegedly paid for sex with a male escort and, just like a politician, didn’t live up to his promises. Naturally, Myers vehemently denies the claim.
It seems the man said Myers identified himself as a mayor from New Jersey and offered his township identification card and gold ID shield as proof during the early-morning meeting at the Fairmount Hotel in Newport Beach. Even though Myers forcefully denied the man’s claims, the website - www.mayormyers.webs.com - had photos that show a man who clearly appears to be Myers in his underwear lying on a bed, as well as other photos of him and personal IDs. The website has since been taken down.
Apparently the man wanted to have pictures and photo IDs of Myers as an insurance policy should he be called a liar.
"I believed Mr. Myers's promises but before leaving I took pictures and video just to make sure someone would believe me if he was proved a liar," the man said in a graphic account of the meeting.
Believing a politician's promises is like believing you will become a billionaire by discovering oil in Harlem. So that was the gay prostitute’s mistake.
The man even provided contact info that included phone numbers on Myers, but which Myers claimed are easy to obtain. Can he say this with "certitude" like a certain New York Congressman did before ultimately owning up to the lurid photos of himself?
Nobody wants to own up to pictures of themselves in tighty-whities, especially if they are blue, and you’re married with two children. So if you’re a sitting politician who claims to be happily married, it’s even more embarrassing.
This is absolutely crazy," Meyers told The Burlington County Times. "I have no idea who this person is. Obviously, we're dealing with a crackpot." He gave two different explanations for how the photographs ended up online.
Mayor Calvin Klein claims to have been down this road before, where a picture was photo-shopped to look like something it wasn’t, alleging that someone could have snuck into his hotel room and taken the pictures.
Ah yes, the classic somebody breaking into your hotel room to snap a Maxim-style photo of you in your underwear gag.
It seems the photos first surfaced on a website started by an anonymous California man affiliated with a gay social hook-up site called Rentboy.
Oddly enough, Myers is declining to have the matter investigated. Clearly, he doesn’t want to become yet another casualty of the Republican party’s endless collection of happily married family men that get caught up in some horrific homosexual scandal, forced to call the obligatory press conference with their subservient wives looking on adoringly, and resign from office. It could’ve been much worse for New Jerseysians had it been a picture of Governor Christie in his underwear.
Michael Hayne is a comedian/VO artist/Columnist extraordinaire, who co-wrote an award-nominated comedy, wrote for NY Times Laugh Lines, guest-blogged for Joe Biden, and writes a column for MSNBC.com affiliated Cagle. Follow him on Twitter and Facebook. Seriously, follow him or he’ll send you photos of Rush Limbaugh bending over in a thong.