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Friday
Mar 23rd

N.Y. Mets mathematically eliminated before start of 2012 baseball season

BY JOEY NOVICK
WHAT EXIT?
SATIRE

With spring training just around the corner, catchers and pitchers for most teams are reporting to Florida and Arizona sometime around Feb.18. The remainder of the team, infielders, outfielders and team coaches report about two weeks later.

Baseball commissioner Bud Selig, who has been in office since 1998, “We were looking forward to another very exciting season of baseball . The 2011 World Series between the…uh…umm… between the American League champion in the National League champion… was very exciting. At least that’s what they told me.”

“I can’t wait,” said Ira “Flip” Silverblatt, 34. "Spring-training is the most exciting time of year for me. It gives me an opportunity to get out of my parents' basement, and go to WaWa’s and buy a newspaper and read about the Mets. Anyway, most of the other kids stop playing online Strat-O-Matic baseball around that time year anyway”. Silverblatt lives with his parents, Max and Celia Silverblatt, retired candy store owners in Freehold, N.J.

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Pecan pie recipe: The perfect complement to pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving

BY MARGARET MORGAN
NEWJERSEYNEWSROOM.COM

Pecan pie is the perfect complement to pumpkin pie on the Thanksgiving table

There’s no question that pie is a staple in American homes during the holidays. Pie ...

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Thanksgiving dining at the Jersey Shore

BY MARGARET MORGAN
NEWJERSEYNEWSROOM.COM

There are so many great choices for dining out this Thanksgiving, it is hard to make a selection. Here are a few ideas for spending the day out at the Jersey Sho...

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Truck driver wakes up with map of N.J. on his foot

BY JOEY NOVICK
WHAT EXIT?
SATIRE

Truck driver Sebastian Kendall, of Wilmette, S.C. was driving through N.J. last week, when he pulled over on to the Garden State Parkway rest area near exit 16, at the Oc...

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'Who Has What?' by Robie H. Harris: A book on sexuality for children

BY SUSIE WILSON
NEWJERSEYNEWSROOM.COM
SEX MATTERS

Most grandmas are not like me: They get their holiday shopping done by Thanksgiving and then sit back and watch everybody else go into panic mode in Dece...

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Hoboken man and family looking for parking spot since April

BY JOEY NOVICK
WHAT EXIT?

SATIRE

Jason Silverblatt, and his wife, Heidi, moved to Hoboken in 2003 from Brooklyn---renting a condo right on Hudson Street, near 10th Street. They have two boys, Matthew (no...

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Levi Strauss says, 'Don’t wash your jeans!'

BY PAM LOBLEY
NEWJERSEYNEWSROOM.COM
NOW THAT’S FUNNY

Levis Strauss wants us to save water by not washing our blue jeans. They say jeans don’t need to be washed all that often. Clearly they have not met...

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Thanksgiving dinner cost: Turkeys up 25 cents this year

BY BOB HOLT
NEWJERSEYNEWSROOM.COM

The price of food is up about 3.5 to 4.5 percent this year, and that will be reflected in the rising cost of a Thanksgiving meal. The cost of Thanksgiving dinner will j...

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Lt. Gov. Kim Guadagno required to yell at public employees in Gov. Christie's absence

BY JOEY NOVICK
WHAT EXIT?
(SATIRE)

After an emergency New Jersey Supreme Court ruling was handed down this week regarding her role as Lt. Governor under the state Constitution, Lt. Governor Kim Guadagno,...

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